[ Not so long ago, any of those outcomes that Nanami anticipates would have been more than likely, but the value of the time that he's spent at this hotel has been immeasurable, in ways he often doesn't realize, until they are put to the test. Like it is now, when a dear friend is in need, showing a sort of emotional vulnerability they can rarely afford. Now, it's near unthinkable that Gojo would brush this off as anything less than the grave truth that it is. Nanami...died. Nanami died, and Gojo wasn't there to do anything about it.
He exhales softly, quietly, his fingers gripping the fabric of Nanami's cardigan tight. ]
...Yeah. I'm sorry, too.
[ It's just as he always tells his students. Sorcerers never die without regrets. They never die without unfinished business, without words unsaid, promises unmade. Nanami knows this, too; they accept it as a part of what's asked of them. Yet even so, with whatever reached out to his spirit after death, he...chose to come here. In spite of those regrets, he chose to seize a little more life, for however long he chooses to, however long he can. He made a choice for himself, and nothing makes his senpai prouder than that. ]
I'm really glad you're here, Nanami.
[ He'd been glad before, even if he hadn't expressed it in quite so many words, because for all the wonderful connections he's made since arriving, no one quite understands the demands of being a sorcerer like a sorcerer themselves. Now he knows they have to cherish their time together all the more, that this is the only place their friendship still bears both halves. They won't...have the chance to again back home.
...If Gojo even gets unsealed this century, but that's something he can worry about later. ]
...Guess I better get my ass out of that box, huh.
[ It takes a moment for Nanami to recover because this was truly the first time he faced the concept of his death since he arrived. Of course, he ruminated on it when he was alone and talked briefly to Yuji about it but his conversation with Yuji was more about his feelings than Nanami's. Nanami could not burden the boy with his own existential thoughts on his mortality, of course not.
For a moment, he presses his face into Gojo's shoulder and just holds the other man tightly, trying to put all the feelings he's been holding back in the box they belong. It's true, there is no way to die without regrets. They know this. It's something you learn the moment you come into jujutsu society. Gojo's known this since he was born. Nanami's known this since he was a teenager. Part of Nanami wonders if it would've been easier if he just never came to the hotel and had to deal with the after.
But he's also glad he had this chance to be here, to see his friend one last time, to see his protege one last time. Even if this ends in nothing more than heartache and Nanami having to be alone in the end, he's glad he chose to come to the hotel. It's true — he just wanted a little bit more time, a little bit more life.
Gojo says he's glad that Nanami is here and the last bit of tension drops from Nanami's shoulders. Now it's all out there, the truth, and Nanami is hiding nothing else from Gojo. There is a relief in him that hasn't been there since the moment he chose to lie to Gojo when he first arrived. The ache of knowing he was hiding something from him this whole time lingered at the back of his mind and now it's gone, now he feels free.
At the last part, that's when Nanami pulls away from the hug and looks at Gojo with concern etched upon his features. He knows he was pushing for Gojo to go back before but now he's worried, neither of them know how long Gojo will end up being sealed and considering Yuji's state of mind when he arrived — it doesn't look like Gojo was able to return just yet. If he had, maybe things would've been better for whatever is happening to Yuji outside of the hotel.
But instead of a don't, instead of a you have to, or what if you don't come back? — Nanami asks, ]
[ They both know what a futile effort it is to try to talk Gojo out of something once his mind is made up, and deep, deep down…he knows it already is. The writing has been on the wall ever since the day he arrived, and a hotel is not a home. It’s just that — a place to stay away from home, not a permanent residence. That’s true for Nanami, and it’s true for himself. Everything he’s had here, everything relationship he’s forged and founded…
He doesn’t want to say they’ve been destined to end. Can’t say it, after the promises he’s made. But…even if he can eventually come back, there are things that only he can do, and he sure as hell can’t do them while he’s lingering here. It’ll eat at him, knowing what he knows now, especially. He…has to go back. Soon. He has to make sure that Nanami’s death wasn’t in vain. That whatever or whoever it was that did this to Yuji pays recompense. There will be a reckoning.
…Yet that’s only when he’s unsealed. ]
…Wish I could tell you. [ A harsh sigh spills from his lips. ] I couldn’t even tell you how much time has already passed while I’ve been in there. Could’ve been minutes, or years.It’s all…jumbled.
[ His mouth thins into a hard line. ]
But it doesn’t matter how long it takes. Either I’ll find a way out, or the others will. The special grades only sealed me because they knew they couldn’t kill me. I’m overdue to remind them why that is.
[ He always takes so much pleasure in jujutsu, in decimating his foes, but it will be a rare kind of privilege to tear apart the ones who sealed him. The one who stole Suguru’s body and paraded around in his skin.
[ There is... some reassurance there in Nanami when he hears Gojo speak with confidence of being able to defeat their enemies, to tear them asunder. Gojo is the strongest sorcerer of their time and it gives Nanami a sick satisfaction to think of him being unsealed and hurting those who have hurt them while he was sealed away. It would've been nice if Gojo tore apart Mahito himself, he thinks, but he's just glad the curse is gone in general.
Nanami also briefly wonders if Gojo will come back. He — He will though, he has to. With Yuji here. With the ties Gojo has made here. With... Nanami still here and not going anywhere. He hopes he comes back, and with news. With good news. They could use it, considering the state of things. ]
You are. There's no way Itadori and the others would rest until they figured out a way to unseal you. It must be difficult for them. [ Considering the state of Yuji, he's sure it is. ] Your return will give them hope they clearly need.
[ He's quiet for a moment, considering. He feels lighter now than he has in weeks and is eager to know what's going on back home now, eager to see Gojo return and give the curses hell for what they've done to Yuji and the others. But he doesn't want to push either, knows he's just... a bystander now. ]
Tell me when you plan to leave. I'll keep watch over Itadori while you're gone.
[ After a moment, he nods, a certain sort of weight to it that has been absent for awhile now. It's not to say that he ever really forgot the burden of his responsibility while staying here, but it had grown easier to set aside, when there hadn't really been any reason for him to be The Strongest here. Was that irresponsible and selfish of him? Yeah, probably, but now he knows what he needs to do.
He's always known, his entire stay here was just...delaying the inevitable, really. ]
...I'll need a little time to settle affairs here. [ He won't leave Itadori behind so soon after being reunited with him, after Itadori fell to pieces against him like he had. He also has his other friends to consider, and Sumina...she's always known it would come to this, too, but that doesn't make it any easier.
It's better if he just focuses on the eventually outcome, instead. After he goes and deals with the curses, after he rips that impostor free of Suguru's body and sets things right, he can come back. He will come back.
Who else is going to deliver the news to Nanami? It has to be him. ]
I know you will. I get the feeling he might try to stop me if I leave, so...he'll need you more than ever.
[ It feels like this conversation is coming to an end and that's a good thing. The air is lighter between them, there's no more secrets, and there's a better understanding of where they both are. This makes Nanami feel reassured. So, he nods when Gojo says he needs some time and he immediately knows why. He's not sure if Itadori could handle being separated so soon from either one of them. ]
I'll be there for him. Make sure he feels supported.
[ A pause and he's not really one to ask about this sort of thing, already feels awkward even considering it but... ]
What will you tell Sumina-san?
[ He's not oblivious, after all. Especially after their lunch together. He knows the two are together in some capacity. Which is an interesting thing, considering what he knows of Gojo's relationship history (or lack thereof). Still, he wants to make sure Gojo feels like he can talk to someone about it even if Nanami isn't sure he's the right person for this either. ]
[ The question catches him off-guard, though after a moment, he realizes it shouldn't be all that surprising. Nanami has always been far more perceptive than he lets on, far more empathetic and thoughtful, so that he had intuited the true nature of his relationship with Sumina is no surprising. Hell, even if he hadn't put together that they were involved, it's apparent that they care about each other a lot. He has other friends here he'll need to stay farewell to, but none of them will be impacted as much as Sumina will.
He presses his lips together before blowing a thin sigh out between them. ]
...She's always known I'd have to go back someday, too. [ But like him, she likely wouldn't have expected it so soon, so suddenly. It's better this way, though, he thinks. His unfinished business has been a roadblock in so many ways in his life, and if he goes back to finish it...it'd be better, in the long run. ] She'll understand.
[ A beat, his gaze finding some idle corner of the room, before he adds: ]
She's a lot like you, you know. She'll work herself to death before reflecting on her own needs.
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He exhales softly, quietly, his fingers gripping the fabric of Nanami's cardigan tight. ]
...Yeah. I'm sorry, too.
[ It's just as he always tells his students. Sorcerers never die without regrets. They never die without unfinished business, without words unsaid, promises unmade. Nanami knows this, too; they accept it as a part of what's asked of them. Yet even so, with whatever reached out to his spirit after death, he...chose to come here. In spite of those regrets, he chose to seize a little more life, for however long he chooses to, however long he can. He made a choice for himself, and nothing makes his senpai prouder than that. ]
I'm really glad you're here, Nanami.
[ He'd been glad before, even if he hadn't expressed it in quite so many words, because for all the wonderful connections he's made since arriving, no one quite understands the demands of being a sorcerer like a sorcerer themselves. Now he knows they have to cherish their time together all the more, that this is the only place their friendship still bears both halves. They won't...have the chance to again back home.
...If Gojo even gets unsealed this century, but that's something he can worry about later. ]
...Guess I better get my ass out of that box, huh.
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For a moment, he presses his face into Gojo's shoulder and just holds the other man tightly, trying to put all the feelings he's been holding back in the box they belong. It's true, there is no way to die without regrets. They know this. It's something you learn the moment you come into jujutsu society. Gojo's known this since he was born. Nanami's known this since he was a teenager. Part of Nanami wonders if it would've been easier if he just never came to the hotel and had to deal with the after.
But he's also glad he had this chance to be here, to see his friend one last time, to see his protege one last time. Even if this ends in nothing more than heartache and Nanami having to be alone in the end, he's glad he chose to come to the hotel. It's true — he just wanted a little bit more time, a little bit more life.
Gojo says he's glad that Nanami is here and the last bit of tension drops from Nanami's shoulders. Now it's all out there, the truth, and Nanami is hiding nothing else from Gojo. There is a relief in him that hasn't been there since the moment he chose to lie to Gojo when he first arrived. The ache of knowing he was hiding something from him this whole time lingered at the back of his mind and now it's gone, now he feels free.
At the last part, that's when Nanami pulls away from the hug and looks at Gojo with concern etched upon his features. He knows he was pushing for Gojo to go back before but now he's worried, neither of them know how long Gojo will end up being sealed and considering Yuji's state of mind when he arrived — it doesn't look like Gojo was able to return just yet. If he had, maybe things would've been better for whatever is happening to Yuji outside of the hotel.
But instead of a don't, instead of a you have to, or what if you don't come back? — Nanami asks, ]
How long do you think it'll take?
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He doesn’t want to say they’ve been destined to end. Can’t say it, after the promises he’s made. But…even if he can eventually come back, there are things that only he can do, and he sure as hell can’t do them while he’s lingering here. It’ll eat at him, knowing what he knows now, especially. He…has to go back. Soon. He has to make sure that Nanami’s death wasn’t in vain. That whatever or whoever it was that did this to Yuji pays recompense. There will be a reckoning.
…Yet that’s only when he’s unsealed. ]
…Wish I could tell you. [ A harsh sigh spills from his lips. ] I couldn’t even tell you how much time has already passed while I’ve been in there. Could’ve been minutes, or years.It’s all…jumbled.
[ His mouth thins into a hard line. ]
But it doesn’t matter how long it takes. Either I’ll find a way out, or the others will. The special grades only sealed me because they knew they couldn’t kill me. I’m overdue to remind them why that is.
[ He always takes so much pleasure in jujutsu, in decimating his foes, but it will be a rare kind of privilege to tear apart the ones who sealed him. The one who stole Suguru’s body and paraded around in his skin.
…He’s well overdue for a proper burial. ]
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Nanami also briefly wonders if Gojo will come back. He — He will though, he has to. With Yuji here. With the ties Gojo has made here. With... Nanami still here and not going anywhere. He hopes he comes back, and with news. With good news. They could use it, considering the state of things. ]
You are. There's no way Itadori and the others would rest until they figured out a way to unseal you. It must be difficult for them. [ Considering the state of Yuji, he's sure it is. ] Your return will give them hope they clearly need.
[ He's quiet for a moment, considering. He feels lighter now than he has in weeks and is eager to know what's going on back home now, eager to see Gojo return and give the curses hell for what they've done to Yuji and the others. But he doesn't want to push either, knows he's just... a bystander now. ]
Tell me when you plan to leave. I'll keep watch over Itadori while you're gone.
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He's always known, his entire stay here was just...delaying the inevitable, really. ]
...I'll need a little time to settle affairs here. [ He won't leave Itadori behind so soon after being reunited with him, after Itadori fell to pieces against him like he had. He also has his other friends to consider, and Sumina...she's always known it would come to this, too, but that doesn't make it any easier.
It's better if he just focuses on the eventually outcome, instead. After he goes and deals with the curses, after he rips that impostor free of Suguru's body and sets things right, he can come back. He will come back.
Who else is going to deliver the news to Nanami? It has to be him. ]
I know you will. I get the feeling he might try to stop me if I leave, so...he'll need you more than ever.
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I'll be there for him. Make sure he feels supported.
[ A pause and he's not really one to ask about this sort of thing, already feels awkward even considering it but... ]
What will you tell Sumina-san?
[ He's not oblivious, after all. Especially after their lunch together. He knows the two are together in some capacity. Which is an interesting thing, considering what he knows of Gojo's relationship history (or lack thereof). Still, he wants to make sure Gojo feels like he can talk to someone about it even if Nanami isn't sure he's the right person for this either. ]
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He presses his lips together before blowing a thin sigh out between them. ]
...She's always known I'd have to go back someday, too. [ But like him, she likely wouldn't have expected it so soon, so suddenly. It's better this way, though, he thinks. His unfinished business has been a roadblock in so many ways in his life, and if he goes back to finish it...it'd be better, in the long run. ] She'll understand.
[ A beat, his gaze finding some idle corner of the room, before he adds: ]
She's a lot like you, you know. She'll work herself to death before reflecting on her own needs.
[ And she probably will when he goes, too. ]