[ Nanami truthfully does not know what he expects Gojo's response to be to his admission. He is expecting anger, for lying to him, for failing him. He is expecting dismissal, because Gojo doesn't do heavy emotions and what is one of the heaviest but grief? He wouldn't be surprised if Gojo just... left. Didn't talk about it to him again. His death is not the point here, after all. His failure is. Nanami just truly does not know what to expect.
So when Gojo does the exact opposite of all things Nanami expects — when he moves forward and hugs Nanami, Nanami does not know what to do. He is frozen for a moment, arms at his side, staring in shock at the wall past them instead. What is this? What is this?
But then something kind of... cracks in him at that. Gojo, his beloved senpai, his oldest friend, is hugging him and calling him an idiot and telling him not to apologize and — and he is so very lucky that he was able to tell Gojo the truth. In another life, he died and Gojo was unsealed and found out that way. They never were afforded a proper goodbye, because that is the life of a sorcerer and that is what they are doomed to.
Tentatively, Nanami's arms come up and his hands clutch at the back of Gojo's shirt. His chin drops against his shoulder and his breath comes out a little shaky as he, yet again, apologizes for what is outside his control. He feels a little like a teenager again, emotions unmoored and control slipping through his fingers. ]
I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
[ His voice cracks at the end there and he closes his eyes, trying not to let the stinging sensation take over. He accepted his death, he made peace with it, he was fine with dying and yet in this moment, he can't help but think —
I don't want to die. He wants to go to Kuantan. He wants to grow old. He wants to get married. He wants to see Gojo best those old fools at the school. He wants to see the man Itadori will become. He doesn't want to leave them. He doesn't want to leave them.
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So when Gojo does the exact opposite of all things Nanami expects — when he moves forward and hugs Nanami, Nanami does not know what to do. He is frozen for a moment, arms at his side, staring in shock at the wall past them instead. What is this? What is this?
But then something kind of... cracks in him at that. Gojo, his beloved senpai, his oldest friend, is hugging him and calling him an idiot and telling him not to apologize and — and he is so very lucky that he was able to tell Gojo the truth. In another life, he died and Gojo was unsealed and found out that way. They never were afforded a proper goodbye, because that is the life of a sorcerer and that is what they are doomed to.
Tentatively, Nanami's arms come up and his hands clutch at the back of Gojo's shirt. His chin drops against his shoulder and his breath comes out a little shaky as he, yet again, apologizes for what is outside his control. He feels a little like a teenager again, emotions unmoored and control slipping through his fingers. ]
I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
[ His voice cracks at the end there and he closes his eyes, trying not to let the stinging sensation take over. He accepted his death, he made peace with it, he was fine with dying and yet in this moment, he can't help but think —
I don't want to die. He wants to go to Kuantan. He wants to grow old. He wants to get married. He wants to see Gojo best those old fools at the school. He wants to see the man Itadori will become. He doesn't want to leave them. He doesn't want to leave them.
He doesn't want to die. ]